Primo Quotes

Doug Stanhope

Douglas Stanhope (born March 25, 1967) is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and author known for his cynical and controversial comedy style.

Read more about this author on here

I love conspiracy theories. I used to just live on it. You know it's all hype and garbage, but you'r ...

View quote

Here's the path to sobriety: Play the Ron Paul drinking game. Watch CNN and take a drink every time ...

View quote

Charlie Chaplin said something to the effect that humor is an act of defiance, that we must laugh in ...

View quote

There's a lot of meth [in Bisbee]. So there's an ex-cop-car Tahoe and a BE DRUG FREE van parked righ ...

View quote

Race, Religion, Ethnic Pride, Nationalism does nothing but teach you how to hate people you have nev ...

View quote

It was either me or Confucius that said the journey of a thousand miles begins with a vicious ass ra ...

View quote

They say 'life is precious'. To who? To you, when you're young and you've got a few dollars in your ...

View quote

I had no musical or athletic ability, and I wasn't particularly good looking. Comedy was something I ...

View quote

Nationalism does nothing but teach you to hate people you never met, and to take pride in accomplish ...

View quote

I love when you get boner spam for boner pills and the subject is Be a better lover. Oh, the boner w ...

View quote

People wrestle alligators but not once has someone done it without an audience.

View quote

There's nothing funnier than getting a death threat via MySpace. Why don't you just write it in a ch ...

View quote

Controversial issues are always more interesting but I don't create material about a subject I have ...

View quote

Every 17 seconds a child dies on this planet from no clean drinking water. Good. Let's try to speed ...

View quote

You want to help mother Earth? Try sodomy. Sodomy is eco-friendly, and abortion is green.

View quote