Gene Weingarten Quotes

Gene Norman Weingarten (born October 2, 1951) is an American syndicated humor columnist at The Washington Post. He is a Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist, and is the only person to win the Pulitzer Prize for Feature Writing twice. Weingarten is known for both his serious and humorous work. Weingarten's column, "Below the Beltway," is published weekly in The Washington Post magazine and syndicated nationally by The Washington Post Writers Group, which also syndicates Barney & Clyde, a comic strip he co-authors with his son, Dan Weingarten, with illustrations by David Clark.

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Gene Weingarten


I have two favorites: Reading Kierkegaard while listening to Mozart's Piano Concerto 9 in E Flat Major, and reading early Bazooka Joe comics in Hebrew.

Gene Weingarten


I feel like no matter what happens in my career endeavors after today, going to grad school is one of the best decisions I've ever made.

Gene Weingarten


When my daughter was a senior in high school, I remember noticing, almost in passing, that her friends were very cute. Which made me realize her friends' fathers probably found Molly very cute.

Gene Weingarten


While it is true that many hep C victims became infected through blood transfusions or organ transplants or in other innocent ways, mine was contracted during my college years, when I showed as much care for my personal health as your average suicide bomber.

Gene Weingarten


The Pulitzer is a crapshoot. Your piece has to hit a few people the right way at the right moment.

Gene Weingarten


Donald Trump is a boor, and cannot stop being a boor.

Gene Weingarten


When she was too young to resist, or even to understand, I turned my daughter into a lifelong, rabid Yankees fan.

Gene Weingarten


One of my favorite footnotes in the hypochondria book [The Hypochondriac's Guide to Life. And Death.] was about the death of one of the King Charleses. He was essentially bled and vomited to death by his doctors. They also drilled holes in his head.

Gene Weingarten


The whole point of corporate mascots is to be distinctive. No one in his right mind would ever confuse the Hamburglar with Mayor McCheese.

Gene Weingarten


I once found myself driving, smoking a cigar, taking notes, and talking on the phone at the same time. I only became completely aware of this when I had to shift, and realized something had to give.

Gene Weingarten


For $60, I once bought a neck massage at a 'massage parlor' that advertised in 'The Washington Post.'

Gene Weingarten


Donald Trump is showing the intellectual rigor, and emotional maturity, of a second grader. That's hardly being age-ist. This is a man who, when accused by Hillary Clinton of being a Putin puppet, actually responded: "No puppet! No puppet! YOU'RE the puppet."

Gene Weingarten


Ask creative people where they get their ideas, and they will roll their eyes. It's the most common question, but it's also a bad one because the answer is inevitably disappointing. From the inside, creativity seems like an arduous task, often involving plebeian, imperfect choices, driven less by inspiration than by deadline.

Gene Weingarten


I believe that sensitivity to issues of race and ethnicity is important, and nuanced, even more so when it intersects with the issue of free speech.

Gene Weingarten


I am the most skilled parallel parker the world has ever known.

Gene Weingarten