Ogden Nash

To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenev ...

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope i ...

Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who neve ...

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

Tonight's December thirty-first, something is about to burst. The clock is crouching, dark and small ...

Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind, But it is very difficult to treat because it cannot even ...

“Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never ...

Baclli swarm within my portalsSuch as ne'r conceived by mortals,But, bred by scientists,Wise and hoa ...

It is common knowledge to every schoolboy and even every Bachelor of Arts, That all sin is divided i ...

Here's a toast to the roast that good fellowship lends, with the sparkle of beer and wine; May its s ...

My garden will never make me famous, I'm a horticultural ignoramus.

Humor is the best means of surviving in a difficult world.

A lady is known by the product she endorses.

When a lady's erotic life is vexed God knows what God is coming next.