“It's lost on me. I can just about tell if it's got a jet engine or one of those funny things on t ...

“Cannibalistic Chicken Whistles”

...

I was always telling everybody that I could be funny.

“Adam was the luckiest man; he had no mother-in-law.”

“I really like the sheriff's street act. It's so funny,”

It is to be observed that 'angling' is the name given to fishing by people who can't fish.

“You can safely assume that you've created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates ...

“If you don't like the heat, get in the shade.”

“He's smart, he's funny and he's got fire in his belly. I can already tell he's got the hunter' ge ...

“I formed a new group called Alcoholics-Unanimous. If you don't feel like a drink, you ring anothe ...

“There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.”

“It's funny how social activists usually protest against the only things that have a credible chan ...

“The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets”

I don't think of myself as funny - I don't fill up a room with my humor... I would fail miserably as ...

“She's honest. Yes, she will say anything. I think it's funny, though.”

“It's a funny old world - a man's lucky if he gets out of it alive.”

As for jokes, I don't think it's necessarily that what I write is funny.

Game design is a funny thing. There are people out there who are really good at it, but it's not cle ...

“Sensible, warm, caring women and MOODY, uptight, erratic, grumpy men DO NOT GO WELL TOGETHER!!! T ...

“if life was like candy, you want yours sweet not bitter. I guess my doctor wanted me to cut down ...